


Just Nott Weasley Enough

by heartofspells



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-23
Updated: 2012-12-23
Packaged: 2017-11-22 03:37:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/605405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heartofspells/pseuds/heartofspells
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fred has a rather interesting night out. Written for the HP Pick-up Lines Challenge at the HPFC forum.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just Nott Weasley Enough

Fred exhaled happily as he walked into the pub. It felt nice to simply relax and forget about his hectic work life for a while. Not to say he didn’t love the shop, but sometimes a man just needed a break.

George understood that just as well as Fred did and it was for that reason, when first opening the shop, that they had come to an agreement. Once a week, every week, one twin would stay and run the shop while the other was free to do whatever he liked. This week it was Fred’s turn.

He grinned brightly as he looked around the wizarding pub he frequented, smacking and rubbing his hands together in delight of all the lovely specimens just waiting to be won over by his charm. He sauntered up to the bar and dared any female in the vicinity to survive.

An hour later, Fred was doing swimmingly, or so he thought. He had acquired a few Floo addresses and was rather pleased with the overall turn-out of the night thus far. He had begun his search for his next attempt when he spied an old school mate nearby. ‘Mate’ being used in the loosest of fashions.

Theodore Nott was leaning casually against the bar, chatting up a rather stunning blonde. The woman did not look particularly amused, and curious, Fred sidled closer to hear their conversation. He seated himself on a stool, back to back with Nott, and listened closely.

“I saw you across the way,” Nott said, “and I just had to come and ask you something.”

“Really?” the witch replied in a bored tone. “What would that be, then?”

“Did you just cast a spell on me, baby?” the former Slytherin continued suavely. “’Cause I’m feeling an _Engorgio_ charm coming on.”

The woman snarled out a noise of disgust and there was a scraping sound as she stood quickly and stormed away. Fred snorted in amusement and turned so that Nott would be able to see his face.

“Problem, Weasel?” he snapped out.

“Oh, not at all,” Fred answered jovially. “I was just wondering whether or not you _ever_ had any success at pulling? That attempt was rather horrific.”

Nott rolled his shoulders stiffly as though trying to keep himself from hitting the other man. Fred’s grin widened.

“What business is it of yours?” he asked sharply. “I bet you couldn’t pull her if you tried.”

Fred turned to face Nott slowly, his eyes narrowing slyly. “You wouldn’t be willing to make a wager on that, would you Nott?”

The other man considered Fred’s words for a moment before he smiled nastily. “You’re on,” he said. “Twenty Galleons to whoever pulls her by the end of the night.”

“Deal,” Fred answered.

“Can you even afford it, Weasel?” Nott challenged.

Fred stood and brushed his hands over his clothes casually. “Just shut it and watch the master work.”

He walked away without another glance at Nott and leaned nonchalantly against the wall next to the brooding woman.

“Hello there,” he greeted politely. She ignored him. “Lovely night for a pub crawl, isn’t it?”

The woman hummed, but did not reply. Her eyes remained locked on the far wall. Fred tried again.

“I’m Fred,” he said, extending his hand. “What would your name be?”

The woman glanced up at him and rolled her brown eyes in irritation. “None of your business,” she retorted.

“Now, that’s not fair,” Fred countered. “I’m simply trying to have a pleasant conversation and you’re going to reject me so easily?”

She studied him for a long, silent moment before accepting his hand gingerly and replying, “Tendra.”

Fred beamed. “Wonderful to meet you, Tendra. Tell me, did you use _Relashio_? ‘Cause there’s sparks between us.”

Tendra scowled and dropped his hand as though she had been burned. She refused to speak to him anymore. As he turned to walk away, however, he thought he saw the smallest smile twitching across her lips.

“Well that went remarkably well,” Nott scoffed as Fred joined him at a nearby table. “Didn’t strain yourself, I hope.”

Fred merely shrugged as he seated himself in a chair and motioned in Tendra’s direction. “All yours,” he offered.

Nott stood and made his slow way over, fighting the thickening crowd. Fred remained where he was. It was a good location, he reasoned. Out of sight, but within earshot.

He listened as Nott chatted with Tendra a bit. He choked when he heard the delivered line.

“A couple of nights with me and Moaning Myrtle will have to get a new nickname.”

There was a resounding smack following the words and Nott returned quickly, his cheek red with the imprint of a hand. Fred laughed uproariously.

“Let’s see you do better,” he snarled and Fred’s laughter increased.

“I won’t get slapped, at least.”

Still chuckling, he made his way back over to the hassled woman. Her shoulders tensed when she saw him approaching and she turned her back on him. Fred paid this no heed and circled around in front of her.

She frowned at him and asked, “Why are you bothering me?”

Fred reached down and picked up her hand. He moved it up to his lips and placed a small, gentle kiss upon the back of it.

“Because not even Veritaserum could make me express how much I’m truly attracted to you,” he murmured softly.

Tendra’s eyes softened, but she still did not smile.

“I appreciate the words,” she said, “but I’m not interested.”

Fred’s eyebrows rose slightly. “I think you’re lying,” he told her.

“And I think you need to leave,” she countered.

Fred grinned as he bowed to her in understanding and walked away. He smirked when he saw Nott sitting at the table, rubbing his still red cheek. He immediately dropped his hand when he saw Fred and sneered.

“Brave enough to try again, Nott,” he taunted, “or do I need to call your mummy?”

Nott growled and launched himself from the table. Fred winced when he heard the quickly delivered words.

“Are you a Dementor? Because you took my breath away.”

There was a shriek of frustration and Nott returned looking downtrodden. Fred grinned again.

“Care to accompany me to see my shining moment?”

“If it happens, it’ll be something I have to see to believe,” Nott grunted.

Fred walked back over to where Tendra was standing, her back still in his direction. Nott stopped a little distance away to observe from afar.

Fred took a deep breath as he approached and spoke his best and last line. “I don’t know a thing about Merlin’s pants, but I’d love to get into yours.”

Tendra turned and stared at him with wide eyes. It was then that he noticed the rather large man she had been talking to. Fred took a hurried step back in Nott’s direction as the man’s eyes burned with anger.

“Brother, d’you think?” Fred whispered hopefully.

Nott smirked. “Boyfriend, I believe.”

“Right.” Fred swallowed. “Time to leave, I think.”

“ _I_ don’t have to,” Nott stated superiorly.

“He’s glaring at _you_ too,” Fred snapped.

Nott glanced up and gawked. He turned quickly and took off running with Fred directly behind him.

“Some shining moment that was, Weasel,” Nott panted out.

Fred tripped him as he passed by and took a moment to pause and wave back at his helpless companion. Nott’s eyes widened and he shouted a curse at a laughing Fred as the large man approached.

Fred hurriedly Apparated back to Diagon Alley. George was going to love this!


End file.
